Monday, February 7, 2011

Bumper Sticker Ideas

WD Writing Prompt: You've been hired by a bumper sticker manufacturer to come up with ideas. Write a clever or witty phrase you'd love to see on a bumper sticker. (If you want, write several.)

Chauffered driving is the life.

Check your mail for driving lesson refunds!

Where are your manners? I am not slow. Is that any way to treat septugenarians?

If only they made traffic signs 200% bigger.

If you can read this, you are not minding the road.

There is no more room in the backseat so lay off!

Septugenarians rule!

Slow! Hyperventilation in progress!

I am on a cheesecake break!

Barney Burnout in Progress!

On the way to pick up my new Porsche!

Alert! Referreeing mom in Action!

Warning: Tiger Mom on Board!

Soccer Mom Referree on board!

Outa the way! Cheering squad on board!

Bathroom: Epic fail!

Watch out! I just got gas!

Chef in a hurry! Uncooperative motorists will be fried!













©SingleSpaced 2011.02.08

WD Writing Prompt: Create a character that has an unusual phobia. Write a scene that causes that character to face his fear.

     She hated being in this predicament. What she hated more was admitting this to herself. Rationalizing, she tried to be stern and chided herself for her behavior. Face her fear! Grab the bull by the horn! Go! Surely each and every adult on this earth surely must have one type of fear or another, was it? In fact, she thought, it's probably one of those things that make people unique in their own way.

          She continued to stand there, immobile. Her hands twisting and clutching at her blouse so tight, that one of the buttons started to become loose. Her legs twisted; her feet, digging into the threadbare carpet.

     It was not going to be that hard, she told herself. But then she could not help but be angry with her nanny for leaving her all alone. Why today of all days did she have to leave for town? Her long time nanny knew very well that she couldn’t cook. And while she knew that it was out of her nanny’s concern why she found herself in this predicament, she still couldn’t help but be angry.

     They were moving tomorrow so movers had taken away all the furniture in the house earlier. The paper plates and cups were on the kitchen table. All that was missing was the food they’d be having until tomorrow morning.  If only her nanny delayed her departure until the man at the door got there, she would have done okay.  

     Her stomach growled as the doorbell rang for the third time. With a great effort, she spoke tentatively from behind the door.

     “Who is it?” she asked.
     “Pizza delivery, ma’am! Please open the door.”
     “Could you find a way to slide the pizza through the door, please?”
     “You want me to do what, ma’am?”
     “Could you find a way to slide the pizza through the door without my having to open it?”
     “I don’t think that would work, ma’am. Your door is flush against the front step. Is your door busted, ma’am?”
     “No. Not really.”
     “Then just please open it, ma’am. I would appreciate it. I still have several deliveries to make. I pay for cold pizzas delivered, you know.”
     “Yes, but I am sorry. I can’t.”
     “What do you mean you can’t?”
     “I have this fear of opening doors.”
    
     Silence followed. “Well, I can understand that ma’am but I’m not about to pay for a pizza that you ordered and got delivered cold simply because you are afraid of opening the door. It’s easy. It won’t bite. Just gently put your hand on the handle, unlock it and turn it slowly.”

     She figured she had no other choice in this predicament. So with a deep breath and one eye closed, she turned the latch and held the cold doorknob with her left hand. Slowly, she turned the knob until the door opened and pulled.

“Here’s your pizza. That’ll be $10.00.”
Disbelieving what had just happened, all she could do was faint.

The End.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Parallel Journey

I start another journey today, taking the highways of cyberspace. I wonder where I will be led and what kind of people I will meet. 

I am excited. Because this blog is for that side of me that people do not normally see. It is for this intimate side of me that runs parallel and sometimes, contradictory to the person most people know and see in "normal", everyday circumstances.

I must admit though that I too, have a lot of discovery to make about this part of myself. I know and acknowledge it exists, but I cannot fully define it, unlike my "default self" :-P

So, here's to new self discovery! May it help me make this world a better place to live in, or at least, help me make a more defined picture of myself in this life.

There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.  ~Anaïs Nin